Turning a Friendship into a Relationship: a Complete Guide

27.05.2019

Psychologists have been arguing for centuries whether friendship between a man and a woman is possible. Everyone has their own answer to this question based on life experience. But practice shows that such a concept does not exist at all. Sooner or later, there is affection between friends of different sexes, it is just a matter of time. We are created for social contacts, relationships, and generation. This is our basic instinct. Therefore, turning a friendship into a relationship is much easier than it seems. Nature is in our favor. Let's find out about the importance of friendship in a relationship.

Friendship vs Relationship

There is no clear line between friendship and relationship. Outwardly, they have a lot in common, so it is very easy to confuse them. Both friendship and love are characterized by stability. Even if there are some squabbles, misunderstanding, and resentment, it all goes away in course of time. At the same time, friends remain friends, and people who love each other try to forget the offenses and achieve reconciliation. Both concepts of friendship and relationships are based on empathy, mutual help, intimacy, as well as respect and support.

What is the difference between friendship and relationship? Love is a very intimate concept, and its main distinction is sex. Of course, there is such a thing as “friends with benefits,” but practice shows that it also involves a love aspect. The second specific distinction of a romantic relationship is interdependence. Friends miss each other without long communication, but it does not result in hysteria and tears, as in the case of relationships. Also, one should not forget about the difference in responsibilities. The decision to devote whole life to the only one person is a serious step, which implies a responsibility for each wrong action. Moreover, there may be more than one friend as compared to love relationships.

Can You Turn Your Friendship into a Relationship?

Many people are tormented by the question, “Can a friendship turn into a relationship?” Yes, of course! After all, the best relationship is a relationship built on friendship. Family psychologists have repeatedly confirmed that if partners perceive each other as friends, their relationship lasts much longer. Moreover, you have a lot of advantages over other people: you know all the strengths and weaknesses of a person you like. You have a flood of shared positive emotions and fond memories. You know their preferences, tastes, and character. You get on well with their parents, who do not have to get used to a new girlfriend. You have gone through thick and thin together, let your friend into the most intimate secrets, and seen each other in different states – anger, happiness, despondency, the morning hangover, illness, anything at all... In addition, such couples usually have a common circle of friends, so you can avoid being jealous of other people from your group of friends.

Therefore, if you use all the available information correctly, then it will not be difficult for you to turn a friendship into relationships. To achieve mutual love, you should show and prove that you are truly enamored and hold affection for your friend.

How to Turn a Friendship into a Relationship?

Almost everyone once fell in love with a best friend. Scientists say that building a friendship before a relationship is very important, as it has a positive effect on the future of a loving couple. You spend a lot of time together, share intimate secrets, and have the same interests – what else is needed for happiness? And so, there are 10 useful tips for going from friendship to relationship.

1. Ask yourself clear questions

First of all, think twice about the decision to start a relationship with a friend. Ask yourself a series of questions that can help you shed light on the situation. First, there are simple and logical questions that are easiest to answer, “Are you both free?” “Are you both looking for a relationship?” then complicate the task, “Can they have any feelings for me?” “Do I have real feelings for them, or it is just a temporary attraction?” “Am I ready to sacrifice friendship for the sake of a relationship that may not work at all?” “What is more important: friendship or romantic relationships with this person?”

2. Watch their behavior

Most people do not know how to hide their feelings. How can you understand if your friend is ready to take your friendly terms to a new level? There are a couple of signs.

• they flirt;
• they often touch you;
• they constantly try to make eye contact;
• they slightly lean forward while talking to you.

Of course, these are not all non-verbal signs that someone likes you but the most significant.

3. Give a gentle hint

If you decide to do something, first try on the role of an intelligence officer and sound out the situation. How can you find out if a friend has any romantic feelings for you? One of the best options is to play a game. So, propose your friend to answer 20 questions. To begin with, ask questions that do not concern the matter directly, and then cut to the chase, “Have you ever fallen in love with a friend?” If the answer is yes, you can ask other leading questions, “How did this story end?” “You confessed your love or keep it to friends?" "What would you advise a person who is in love with their close friend?" etc.

4. Be straightforward

Sincere and direct communication is the key to good relationships, but the transition from friendship to romantic relationships is a kind of minefield. The best way to move through this uncharted territory is to tell the truth. You should make sense of what kind of relationship you are interested in: a friendship with “benefits” or long-term relationships? It is important to hunt down this question before making any love confessions.

5. Ask for help

Give your friend the opportunity to see in you not only a comrade of the opposite sex but also a person who wants to be with them. Ask them for help as often as possible, even if you can do something a thousand times better. It has been proven that people appreciate relationships in which they invest more energy and effort. The more your friend spends time and energy on you, the more they become emotionally attached to you.

In turn, do not forget to thank them, being generous with compliments – say how smart, strong, and resourceful they are. Also, physical contact will not be superfluous. Feel free to hug your friend or take their hand. If you go somewhere together, behave like their partner, and not just a "friend and comrade." Give them the opportunity to care for you.

6. Try to arrange an insidious date

Of course, you want to be alone with them in a restaurant or in the dark cinema hall. But such an invitation immediately lays your intentions bare, and if a friend is not ready for a serious relationship, all your efforts will be wasted. Therefore, ask them to keep you company in the things that you need to do anyway: to go somewhere or buy something. This is a great opportunity to spend time together and grow a little closer.

7. Add more sexuality

You should not change your image fundamentally; it is just enough to work on some details. Most importantly, wear something that makes you feel comfortable.

8. Change your behavior

You should behave a bit sexier and try to touch a friend if the situation allows it. Touch their shoulder or hair, brush a non-existent speck of dust off their forehead, or accidentally laid your hand on their arm. This is one of the best tips on how to move a friendship into a relationship.

9. Do not be afraid to confess your feelings

If you feel that the time has come, you can try to talk with a friend about your true feelings for them. However, do not make much fuss about it. Just wait when you will be alone and tell your friend how you appreciate your friendship. Then add that you would like to take the relationship to a new level. Maybe they have wanted it for a long time but were afraid to confess their love.

10. What you should not do if you want to turn a friendship into a relationship:

• do not rush things;
• do not try to poison their relationship with another person;
• do not become obsessed and too intrusive;
• do not refuse friendship if they do not want to start a romantic relationship.

Friendship to Relationship: Main Stages

What should you expect from a romantic relationship with a friend? The transition from friendship to relationships is slightly different from the development of ordinary romantic relationships between strangers. Therefore, let's consider the 5 main stages of the transition from friendship to relationship.

Stage One: Attraction

Any serious relationship begins with a feeling of attraction, and romantic relationship between friends is no exception. The first stage is usually the happiest and shortest. Bright emotions and vibrant hormones put a person into a state of constant nervous excitement. This is reflected in the critical perception of the world: a friend seems to be the ideal partner for a romantic relationship.

Stage Two: Resentment

After the first stage, relationships in a couple become ordinary, predictable, and stable. The passion has already smoothed down. Romantic relationships allow people to learn new things about each other and spend more time together. Although friendship before a serious relationship does work, and you already know a lot about the strengths and weaknesses of the character of your friend, you can start perceiving them in a completely different way while being in a relationship with this person. The drawbacks of your friend, which previously seemed insignificant, can now annoy you. After all, the relationship between lovers and friends is significantly different.

Friends notice more and more shortcomings of each other, start to conflict and think that their romantic relationship is a wrong decision. At this stage, it is very important to refrain from searching for another “ideal” partner: it threatens with disappointment and the probability of losing not only love but also a true friend.

Stage Three: Patience

Friends who were able to get through the previous stage begin to understand that they need to settle conflicts and reach compromises. They learn to forgive, be patient, and accept a partner as they are. If they manage to do this, the relationship moves to a new level.

Stage Four: Acceptance

At this stage, partners no longer require anything from each other but want to do something pleasant for a loved one. It happens consciously. They learn to trust, respect, appreciate, and understand each other. Thus, the couple begins to approach true love.

Stage Five: True Love

The eventual result of romantic relationships between a man and a woman is true love. Timid attraction and incandescent passions are long gone. People have learned to trust, respect, and care for each other. The result of this hard work is a strong emotional bond and long-awaited harmony in relationships.

As you can see, turning a friendship into a relationship is perfectly possible. The main thing is to be completely honest with your friend and strive toward happiness. Remember that everyone is the architect of their own happiness. Keep at it and love each other!